Goodbye, 2016 and Book Thoughts

If 2016 is going to be like the two weeks I just had, I am more than ready to kick 2016 out the door.  Little did I know the ultrasound was the tip of the iceberg.  But it's fine.  A new week. A new start. And a chance for happier news! Like the good news we received Monday!  After a very, very long ultrasound, the baby's heart looks completely fine! I have been too busy to really dwell on the thought that something could be wrong, which I am thankful for.  Also, Porter, my Porter, who has NEVER had a problem being with other people, now has a problem.  His first time at nursery he did awesome.  But Sunday he had complete anxiety attack and three major meltdowns which landed him back with me or Trent.  Then Monday when Trent took him to the babysitter, he totally lost it again. I am not strong enough for that. Good thing Trent dropped him off because I would have been crying with Porter, for sure.  I mean, we have 11 weeks more of this.  11 more week of babysitters and school.  11. More. Weeks. His bedtime has been rougher also.  If we put him down has his usual time, 8 o'clock, he will lay in bed for an hour before he actually falls asleep.  And he only takes one nap, which is about an hour long. I hope this a stage. I really hope this is a stage.
Anyways, it really just hasn't stopped.  Porter got the flu again this week and was throwing up.  So I was taking half days and trying to make things work between Trent's schedule and mine. 
Sometimes it can all seem overwhelming.  But, no matter how many times I told myself these past 15 days, "I just can't do it for one more day. I can't do it anymore."  I did.  I got up, and I did another day.  And I am pretty proud of that. 
I finished the book, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." And... I liked it.  Since reading that book I have made a few changes and it's made a difference.  One thing that really stood out to me was the frump syndrome, or whatever she calls it.  Basically, you stop putting on make-up, dressing nice, and basically trying.  [Insert two hand emoji here]  If you were to ask me, I had an excuse.  I mean, you try being pregnant, working 40+ hours week, keeping the house clean, cooking dinner, all while being a good mother and wife.  
WHEN THE HECK DO I HAVE TIME TO GET READY?   But.  There is my problem again.  I let excuses dictate my potential.  I let the excuse, "I am too busy," override respect for myself.  And Trent didn't marry a frump.  So, I made the change and have gotten ready almost every day.  Because when Porter is throwing up and you are awake most of the night sleeping on a recliner in his room, you don't get much sleep and you will look like a zombie the next day.  But for the most part, I have done super well at doing my hair, putting on make-up and looking like a teacher.  I just feel better about myself. 
Nagging was a whole chapter.  Because it needs to be.  I can really get one Trent when I want something done.  Because I want it done, like now.  One night, I asked Trent to put away the dishes and then I would wash the ones in the sink.  He said that he would do it tomorrow because he wanted to relax for the night. I get that.  The next morning, I gently reminded him again and he said he was planning to do it after something else.  Okay..... So I sat down and started watching Daniel Tiger with Porter.  20 minutes later, his other priority was accomplished, but not the dishes and instead he was on his computer.  I was secretly fuming.  Then I asked myself how I could apply what I have been reading in my book.  Then the thought came to me, I am not doing anything either.  I am just watching T.V., and if I want them done so badly right now, then I guess I'll do them. So. I got up, and put away the dishes.  When I was almost done, Trent looked up and saw what I was doing.  Immediately, he jumped up and said that he was going to do that.  I shared with him why I decided to do them, but also my frustration -- in a super calm, nonchalant way.  He didn't say anything.  15 minutes later, I asked Trent if he could throw away the trash when he left for his church meetings.  And you know what, he just got up and did it right then?!  And I told him how grateful I was for him helping out around the house. 
That might seem small, but it started something.  Yesterday Trent picked up the living room when I came home early from work to watch Porter while he went to school.  He said, "I didn't want you worrying about a messy house on your half-day.  I just want you to focus on Porter."  And then today, I came home and he had vacuumed.  Does he do something every day, not always.  But he does a lot more now.  He does what he can, and I accept it with gratitude.  I use to be like, "Yeah you may have picked up a few toys, but sometime during your day you couldn't find time for dishes? Or mopping? Or one load of laundry?" Why would he want to help me with that type of attitude? 
 Sister Hinckley once said about President Hinckely when he had been serving as prophet for about a year, "He has always been a wonderful man, but there is something special about him now.  The mantle is upon him and I try to remember that when he leaves his ties draped over the sofa [that must be man thing because Trent does that too and I want to SCREAM!] I try to remember that he isn't perfect, just almost perfect."
What I am most interested to see is how our lives change when our roles change.  Will he still be this helpful?  Will we still be this strong as a couple?  Will I get mad when he comes home late from work and complain about his job?  This book puts that last excuse to SHAME.  And although I see her point, I also see the need for balance a little more than she does.   Anyways, I am on to a new book, No One Can Take Your Place by Sheri Dew.  And afterwards, I think I will be reading about or by Sister Hinckley because I admire her greatly.